Friday, November 28, 2008

Reader's Digest Chirstmas songs

(sing to the tune of Hark! The Herald Angels Sing)

Bark! The Hairy Angels Sing
"Bark!" the Labradoodles sing.
"Look at us, the latest thing.
Curly hair and tempers mild,
Big and small dog reconciled."
"Don't forget us!" call the puggles,
Shorkies yap, "We're best for snuggles."
"Wait a sec!" the mutts proclaim.
"Neath our fur, we're all the same.
Hark! Tho' wondrous breeds abound,
Don't forsake the local pound."

Okay, I thought it was funny. I found it in the December Reader's Digest
But wait there's more.

Taken for a Ride
(to the tune of "Sleight Ride")
Just hear that cashier jingling,
Ring ting ting-a-ling, ooh!
That will be 16 dollars
For three bananas for you.

Come watch our dollar falling
While friends are bawling "boohoo!"
Because it's 16 dollars
For five green olives for you.

Giddyup, giddyup, giddyup, they go,
Those prices we know.
They're leapin' like those
heatin'bills we owe.
Going up, going up, going up, it's tons
For hot dogs and buns.
We're tryin', our credit's dyin'
Did somebody say "bank run"?

Our cheeks are red from sneezing
Since it is freezing in here.
We're bundled up in blankies
And craving hankies and beer.

Let's move into the Taurus
And sing a chorus or two
Because it's 16 dollars
For seven fish sticks for you.

Deck the Malls
Deck the malls with stuff from China.
Fa la la la la la la la la!
Hats and Bratz and Dad's reclina,
Fa la la la la la la la la!

Don we non-U.S. apparel,
Fa la la deficit, Blah blah blah!
Shrug "Oh, well" and watch Will Ferrell,
Fa la la la la and lad-di-da!

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